accidents with large metal things

...generally don't turn out well. "how did you manage to do that?" is usually the first response. i've tired of the answer, given too many times -- i hit myself with a car. my knee may never be the same. i played a gig i wasn't scheduled to an hour and some time later.

"i hope you can still play good. our friends are here," my mother says. i'm on my second margarita.

"so really, how did you manage to do that?" i hear you want to ask.

i have two chows, one black, one white, i call them my tao dogs. the black one's hair was six, eight inches plus, it was 100 degrees in may, and i had him shaved. bald. i was stunned.

i pulled into the drive, it slants at a good angle towards the house, i forgot to put the car in park, engaged the emergency brake, and as most emergency brakes are wont to do, it failed. in the meantime i had opened the garage door, noticed a hornet on a hornet's nest, and moved up a foot or so to examine the hornet. when i felt something brush against my knee, i brushed back; it was after all unusually hot and buggy, even for here. turns out it was the car: i remember my body curved like a comma, i remember the dog motionless, staring. "uh, now we going in the car. uh, now we hitting the mama." i remember little else.

actually i remember playing, standing and playing. mypace has a picture of it, a pretty good picture in fact. i remember crawling into bed and the agonizing pain of a strained groin and a strained medial collateral ligament. i remember calling my mother and asking if i should go to the emergency room. "no, it didn't seem to be that bad." endorphins are the wonder drug. she dreamed that night of my pain, and called to check on me the next day.

i don't remember jumping into the car and stopping it before it (a) rolled over me or (b) rolled into the hot water heater. i saw the hand print in car dust, two days later, coming out of the doctor's office in the bright, hot sun. i don't remember swinging around to grab the car and jumping out of the way, though at times i almost can. these are known unknowns. they matter none. i may remember my fut hitting the brak, could be a false memory, alin all i managed to go with life with less vicodin than one might imagine.

now i deal with pain in my knee, off and on. i can tell when rain is on the way, or cold rain is lurking. if i overdo it by far, the pain creeps up to my abdomen, appears there is a tendon that attaches there from the knee. if i had taken more than a couple of days to heal, well, i possibly wouldn't be dealing with it -- still -- i feel exceptionally fortunate for the protection around me and the body i was born with.

i often forget to mention: the hornet stung me too.